A RECOVERING SHOPPING ADDICT
I am having a really interesting relationship with money at the moment. In the past, I have been an overspender and guilty of going into small amounts of debt to be stylish. I can admit I have literally indebted myself to fashion, and in the past year, I wanted to change the way I see and use money. When I received money, I never felt I had enough. I was in an overspending/overconsuming mindset and compulsively spending and shopping for everything. If something didn't fit or look right, I kept it, building up piles of unworn clothes in my spare bedroom closets. Key word closets: by the end of last year, my walk-in wardrobe, two spare bedroom wardrobes and three built-in shelving units became consumed by clothes. The challenge was that I wasn’t wearing any of these clothes; I was collecting them just in case I needed them again. With this many clothes and shoes and a desire to move into a new home, I intend to become better with my money and downsize my wardrobe.
In my mind, I was collecting and saving clothes for my future daughter and her friends to wear; in reality, I was overshopping and hoarding, creating a greater issue for myself. I think we can all fall into the trap of collecting vs consuming, and we have to be mindful of what our shopping habits are really doing. Do I really need three red leather corsets I have worn once and keep just in case, or can I sell two and keep one? Do I need three of the same knee-high boots, or can I sell two and keep the Prada ones? Do I need jeans in three sizes, two small, or can I sell or donate them to someone who might actually wear them? Do I even wear pink, or did I buy it for fun?…
In my brain, I am collecting; in reality, I am hoarding and typically overspending on the same things that look slightly different. Over the years, I have enabled myself to consume and consume, and last year, I wanted to change that. My dream of a large walk-in closet came true, but now I think it's much cooler to have a smaller, well-curated wardrobe instead of hoarding multiple items of unworn clothing.
Clothing takes up space, and space takes up energy. I think stale, unworn energy with clothes creates stale energy within your home, and it’s important to circulate the energy and move things around. When we dont clothes, life in many ways leaves them, leaving stagnant energy throughout your whole wardrobe. When you realise unworn clothing, the sale energy goes, and someone new can bring life to a once very beautiful garment.
This year, I have been purging my wardrobe and trying to sell or donate as much as possible. The stale energy of unworn clothes taking up space in my home is slowly being removed. The interesting thing is that when I see something I like online, I now naturally ask myself, do I need this? Do I have something similar to this? Is the quality worth the cost? Do I really want this? More often than not, I pass on the purchase or return it out of guilt. The more we question what we need and see how much we truly have, the more our relationship with shopping changes over time. I am not perfect at all; however, I can feel my relationship with money and overconsuming changing, which feels really empowering. When we see what we have, we see what we no longer need and desire and can make fewer long-term purchases. I am still learning, and in the early stages of healing, my relationship with money and overconsumption, but what I can say is I feel empowered letting clothes go and questioning every purchase I wish to make. I think money is a unique tool to experiment with, and I have overspent for years because I have been in a relationship where I can, and I dont think it’s very healthy for me long term.
Despite being able to overconsume, I no longer wish to overconsume.
Whats your relationship like with money and shopping? I love to hear :)
Love, Chiara x